Author Topic: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?  (Read 2723 times)

Offline Skullmaster

  • God Of Cars
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1520
  • Post quality +1/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Admin Force, Co-Owner Wanna-be
    • Acidmods
Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« on: April 03, 2008, 09:41:47 PM »
I need to have a resume for a apprenticeship program. I dont even rember how to write one. Anyone want to give me some help, maybe send me one that they have as an example? I also have to write an essay explaining why I want to get in the apprenticeship program. The program consists of industrial business, one is a machine shop and the other is a welding/manufacturing company. Here is what I have so far. It cannot exceed 250 words. Here it is... let me know if there is something I should add or change...

My name is Douglas. I am applying for the apprenticeship program for multiple reasons. One of the main reasons of me wanting to take the apprenticeship program is to get on the job training in the industry field. I think this will help me with deciding on a future job and give me training for the future. Another reason why I am applying for the program is because I am a very hands on type of person. I love to use work with not only my brain power but with my hands. I love seeing how things are built and I think it would be really interesting to be apart of the actual process. I enjoy building things and I have a lot of determination. At the moment I am builing a 1929 Chevy Sedan. I started out with a body and have build my own frame and the rest of the parts I can. This required a lot of determination and I proved to my self that I have that. I hope you will see that I would really enjoy working for your business and that I would be a great asset. I cant wait to see you at the interviews! That is all until then. Thanks for reading this!
« Last Edit: April 03, 2008, 09:56:34 PM by Skullmaster »

Offline Tec_

  • EL-Wire King
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1869
  • Post quality +2/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • EL Wire King
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #1 on: April 03, 2008, 10:08:12 PM »
that may work as your cover letter

resume examples
http://classes.dunwoody.edu/automation/

Offline Skullmaster

  • God Of Cars
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1520
  • Post quality +1/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Admin Force, Co-Owner Wanna-be
    • Acidmods
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #2 on: April 03, 2008, 10:27:42 PM »
tec, that link was super helpful! So far my resume looks awesome. I'll post it later when I get a little farther.

ccccpie

  • Guest
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #3 on: April 03, 2008, 10:28:25 PM »
tec, that link was super helpful! So far my resume looks awesome. I'll post it later when I get a little farther.
Goodluck sir.


YARR HARR TIMBER ME TEE BEING A PIRATE IS ALRIGHT TO BE

Offline Tec_

  • EL-Wire King
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1869
  • Post quality +2/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • EL Wire King
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #4 on: April 04, 2008, 07:00:49 AM »
no problem bro. the only suggestion that was made by our career councilor was to ditch all the bolding and get more creative with your job descriptions (flowerier, wordy, descriptive, ect...) 

Offline FreeK

  • a-LeeK
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1980
  • Post quality +3/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Team CYBER for life
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #5 on: April 04, 2008, 11:36:11 AM »
My name is Douglas. I am applying for the apprenticeship program for multiple reasons. One of the main reasons of me wanting to take the apprenticeship program is to get on the job training in the industry field. I think this will help me with deciding on a future job and give me training for the future. Another reason why I am applying for the program is because I am a very hands on type of person. I love to use work with not only my brain power but with my hands. I love seeing how things are built and I think it would be really interesting to be apart of the actual process. I enjoy building things and I have a lot of determination. At the moment I am builing a 1929 Chevy Sedan. I started out with a body and have build my own frame and the rest of the parts I can. This required a lot of determination and I proved to my self that I have that. I hope you will see that I would really enjoy working for your business and that I would be a great asset. I cant wait to see you at the interviews! That is all until then. Thanks for reading this!


apprentinship
built
this has required, this is requiring

just some friendly spell check/grammar check

Offline Skullmaster

  • God Of Cars
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1520
  • Post quality +1/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Admin Force, Co-Owner Wanna-be
    • Acidmods
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #6 on: April 06, 2008, 07:16:10 PM »
Here's what I have for my resume...

Douglas Hemsworth
Adress **CENSORED**
St. Francis, MN 55070
Home Phone **CENSORED**
thepspmodder@hotmail.com

Objective:  To obtain employment as a student apprentice

Education:

St. Francis High School            St. Francis, MN      2005 to Current
         
Metal Technology
   Learned basic concepts of metal working
   Learned basic welding techniques
   Learned basic manual lathe operations
   Learned basic programming and operation of CNC plasma cutter
Welding Technology 1
   Learned advanced welding techniques
   Learned advanced concepts of metal working
Welding Technology 2
   Expanded knowledge and experience with learned welding techniques
   Learned advanced metal fabrication
   Learned basics of auto body processes (primer, filler, paint)
Machine Tool Technology
   Learned basic concept of metal machining
   Learned basic operation of manual mills
   Learned basic programming and operation of CNC mill
   Learned advanced operation of manual metal lathe
Independent Study: Building A Car, 1929 Chevy Sedan “Rat Rod”
       Research of car building concepts
   Complete fabrication of custom split frame
   Chopping and sectioning of body


Is this all I need or is there more to a resume? Any tips for anything to be added are appreciated

Offline Tec_

  • EL-Wire King
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1869
  • Post quality +2/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • EL Wire King
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #7 on: April 06, 2008, 09:37:10 PM »
i would go a little more in depth on what you learned, not just "learned basic concepts of metal working" explain what you've done. you want descriptive sentences. not fragments

Offline Skullmaster

  • God Of Cars
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1520
  • Post quality +1/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Admin Force, Co-Owner Wanna-be
    • Acidmods
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #8 on: April 06, 2008, 10:12:48 PM »
ok, I'll work on it more tonight and I'll post what I got tommarow. Is that all a resume consists of, what I typed above?

Offline Tec_

  • EL-Wire King
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1869
  • Post quality +2/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • EL Wire King
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #9 on: April 07, 2008, 06:37:12 AM »
you want past job history on there as well, but i dont know if you have any yet, so i would focus on school

Offline budgray19

  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 2134
  • Post quality +1/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • OH NO MY CHITTY CHICKEN, NOO NOT MY CHITTY BEEF
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #10 on: April 07, 2008, 12:53:45 PM »
put in there ur bike class and what all yall do in there and what yall have build
exc


Offline Skullmaster

  • God Of Cars
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1520
  • Post quality +1/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Admin Force, Co-Owner Wanna-be
    • Acidmods
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #11 on: April 07, 2008, 06:16:13 PM »
Here's some changes... Is thiis all I need or is there different pages or parts to it that I"m missing? Thanks again guys!  oh, and there is bullet points in there, just had to take them out for AM since it screws up the post
Douglas Hemsworth
Address **CENSORED**
St. Francis, MN 55070
Home Phone **CENSORED**
thepspmodder@hotmail.com

Objective:  To obtain employment as a student apprentice

Education:

St. Francis High School            St. Francis, MN      2005 to Current
         
Metal Technology
   Learned basic concepts of metal working. Taught tools of the trade, welders, sheers, hammers ect.
   Learned basic welding techniques. Oxyacetylene and mig welding learned along with basic welding joints, butt, lap, corner, T and edge.   Learned basic manual lathe operations. Created a nut and bolt from 1” hex bar.
   Learned basic programming and operation of CNC plasma cutter. Created a design on the computer and cut it out of 16 gauge steel.
Welding Technology 1
   Learned advanced welding techniques. Tig, tig aluminum and arc welding learned.
   Learned advanced concepts of metal working. Learned about different types of metal and how they are used.
Welding Technology 2
   Expanded knowledge and experience with learned welding techniques. A large scale project was required, therefore I continued work on my car, mentioned later, which consisted of final customization of the frame, mounting of front a rear axles and the body.
   Learned advanced metal fabrication. Metal preparation for paint, consisted of grinding, sanding.
   Learned basics of auto body processes (primer, filler, and paint). Etched, primed, body filled, final paint done on the dash for my 1929 Chevy.
Machine Tool Technology
   Learned basic concept of metal machining. Climb, conventional, peripheral and face milling learned.
   Learned basic operation of manual mills. Produced the head of a machinists hammer.
   Learned basic programming and operation of CNC mill
   Learned advanced operation of manual metal lathe. Produced handle for machinists hammer. Learned use of knurling tool.
Independent Study: Building a Car, 1929 Chevy Sedan “Rat Rod”
   Research of car building concepts. Roll cage, safety, frame building and body chopping and sectioning researched.
   Complete fabrication of custom split “Z” frame. Built of 1.5”x3” steel, supporting a Ford 9” rear axle, mid 40’s front axle and a Ford in-line 6 engine.
   Chopping and sectioning of body. Started at a height of 47”, removed 6” from the windows and 6.5” from the body to make a total body height of 34.5”.


Chopper Class (06-07)
   Research of different bike types, research then discussed during class to decide on a bike style for the build.
   Custom Fabrication of multiple parts to create an entire bike. I personally helped fabricate many miscellaneous parts like rubber mounting system for the gas tank and seat pan fabrication and final assembly.
« Last Edit: April 07, 2008, 09:52:26 PM by Reaper »

Offline FreeK

  • a-LeeK
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1980
  • Post quality +3/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Team CYBER for life
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #12 on: April 07, 2008, 06:21:02 PM »
if you have any "community service" that you have done in the past, it would be a good idea to add that too

-donations
-volunteer work
-etc

Offline Tec_

  • EL-Wire King
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1869
  • Post quality +2/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • EL Wire King
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #13 on: April 07, 2008, 09:32:37 PM »
i would also suggest cleaning up your facebook and/or myspace its quite common for employers to check those and they will judge you on what kind of content you have in them.


not saying they will, but its not a bad thing to be all squared away in that section.

Offline Reaper

  • Fear the Reaper!
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • Around the block
  • *
  • Posts: 2765
  • Post quality +1/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Fear the Reaper
Re: Help me with a resume and some proof reading?
« Reply #14 on: April 07, 2008, 09:53:15 PM »
I spell checked it for yeah
for future reference, don't spell the word axle as axel...

 

SMF spam blocked by CleanTalk
SimplePortal 2.3.5 © 2008-2012, SimplePortal