« previous next »
Pages: [1]   Go Down

Author Topic: is this anygood??  (Read 2741 times)

Offline gamerdude767

  • Blogs & Media Member
  • Acid Modder
  • *
  • Posts: 634
  • Post quality +1/-0
  • Gender: Male
is this anygood??
« on: April 07, 2009, 01:02:09 PM »
hey,
 
        im trying to write a song, its about a girl who make me smile whenever i see her.


  all i got is this..


     Everytime i look at you, you make me smile,   
     the next time I see you, I try to hide it.
     But I just can't help it.

   help me out here, tell me what is good/bad and what i could change/add

 thanks in advance
     scott

« Last Edit: April 07, 2009, 01:05:45 PM by gamerdude767 »
Logged

Quote from: H-Sauce
**Long Pause**........
Yup, thats better than balloons

Offline FreeK

  • a-LeeK
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1980
  • Post quality +3/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Team CYBER for life
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #1 on: April 07, 2009, 03:47:52 PM »
we need a theme/beat/genre to go with the lyrics

rock - not really
metal - deff not
acoustic rock - maybe
pop - hah maybe
Logged

Offline ProperBritish

  • Acid Modder
  • *
  • Posts: 856
  • Post quality +0/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Raining Blood! From A Lacerated Sky!
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #2 on: April 08, 2009, 11:29:21 AM »
the lyrics seem not cryptic enough, they're rather bland imo.

try to say what you want, without saying it.
Logged


Quote from: ≤Ʀαωгу≥
you know who i would bone? daffy duck

Offline DarkShot

  • I approve your mom
  • Acid Modder
  • *
  • Posts: 781
  • Post quality +0/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • ÜBERRAPESKILLETS
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #3 on: April 08, 2009, 11:34:30 AM »
Yeah, behind the lyrics are usually a set of totally different ideas from the words actually spoken.

For instance, I'll use Red Flag by Billy Talent:

Quote
Cast off the crutch that kills the pain
The Red Flag waving never meant the same
The kids of tomorrow don't need today
When they live in the sins of yesterday

The idea behind the song isn't about a flag or kids, but rather communism, and overcoming it.
Logged

Offline SN!P3R

  • Millennium Poster
  • *
  • Posts: 1444
  • Post quality +0/-10
  • Gender: Male
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #4 on: April 08, 2009, 12:20:34 PM »
you should make it funeral-style song, then going onto screamo.


works every time
Logged
BEST 360 MODDING
HELP OUR ECONOMY!

360 MASHUP THREAD

Offline atomicareprise

  • Registered BST
  • Acid Modder
  • *
  • Posts: 595
  • Post quality +2/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • FILIPINO SINCE BIRTH
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #5 on: April 08, 2009, 12:24:27 PM »
or you can start a boy band group...lol!!
Logged
viperfan91 (phat), thaq93 (psp phat parts)
pinoyballa  (2 phats ), tri-edge (slim)
Awilliams357- to be shipped

Offline ProperBritish

  • Acid Modder
  • *
  • Posts: 856
  • Post quality +0/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Raining Blood! From A Lacerated Sky!
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #6 on: April 08, 2009, 03:16:18 PM »
Quote from: SN!P3R on April 08, 2009, 12:20:34 PM
you should make it funeral-style song, then going onto screamo.


works every time

good old critical acclaim
Logged


Quote from: ≤Ʀαωгу≥
you know who i would bone? daffy duck

Offline FreeK

  • a-LeeK
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1980
  • Post quality +3/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Team CYBER for life
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #7 on: April 08, 2009, 04:02:06 PM »
Quote from: ProperBritish on April 08, 2009, 03:16:18 PM
critical acclaim

isnt screamo....

but it also depends on the tone that your trying to put it into.
sad, happy, depressed, angry, etc.
Logged

Offline ra1n

  • Millennium Poster
  • *
  • Posts: 1031
  • Post quality +1/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • I'm not like other girls ^_^
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #8 on: April 08, 2009, 04:30:13 PM »
Quote from: ProperBritish on April 08, 2009, 03:16:18 PM
good old critical acclaim
thats hardrock
Logged

Quote from: kink192 on October 09, 2008, 12:34:34 PM
getting old is mandatory growing up is optional.

Offline ProperBritish

  • Acid Modder
  • *
  • Posts: 856
  • Post quality +0/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Raining Blood! From A Lacerated Sky!
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #9 on: April 08, 2009, 05:27:10 PM »
technicalities ra1n technicalities

organ to dist. guitar and screaming, i think i got close. =P
Logged


Quote from: ≤Ʀαωгу≥
you know who i would bone? daffy duck

Offline FreeK

  • a-LeeK
  • Acidmods Alumni
  • E = MC² Mad Scientist
  • *
  • Posts: 1980
  • Post quality +3/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Team CYBER for life
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #10 on: April 08, 2009, 05:44:03 PM »
Quote from: ProperBritish on April 08, 2009, 05:27:10 PM
technicalities ra1n technicalities

organ to dist. guitar and screaming, i think i got close. =P

actually matt shadow's yell is not a scream at all....if you want to hear sceamo, listen to older A7x like the sounding the seventh trumpet album
or listen to the band Emarosa, theyre a better deffinition of screamo
technicalities PB technicalities.
Logged

Offline ProperBritish

  • Acid Modder
  • *
  • Posts: 856
  • Post quality +0/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Raining Blood! From A Lacerated Sky!
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #11 on: April 09, 2009, 05:10:15 AM »
lol

the difference between a scream and a yell? i did not know there was one. :P
Logged


Quote from: ≤Ʀαωгу≥
you know who i would bone? daffy duck

Offline ~:Dhruv:~

  • Millennium Poster
  • *
  • Posts: 1321
  • Post quality +0/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • [quote author=Reaper link=topic=30647.msg227184#ms
    • Infectech
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #12 on: April 09, 2009, 06:36:50 AM »
Hmmmmm i think a scream is more narrower in the spectrum , more shrill ! :D
Logged
Quote from: ¢Starrz on January 16, 2010, 10:10:46 PM
  you look like a carrot.
Quote from: alentris on January 17, 2010, 10:41:58 AM
My nickname at school is carrot cake, because i can't get tan. I get orange. and my face is shaped like a carrot. And i make a mean carrot cake.

Offline Timmy

  • Millennium Poster
  • *
  • Posts: 1155
  • Post quality +1/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Acidmods User
Re: is this anygood??
« Reply #13 on: April 13, 2009, 01:46:05 AM »
to give it more context for properbritish's taste....

would you honestly say till lindeman's coarse vocal's are within the same category as say avenged sevenfold? and either of them with in flames or opeth?

there's lot's of different words to describe coarse vocals depending on the pitch and coarseness.

screaming
yelling
growling

etc
etc

as for the lyrics, people are going to....wait have...offer opinions based on there own taste in music....me personally i think they are FAN-TASTIC*








*fantastic entailing walking up to her with an acoustic guitar playing two chords over and over singing in a cliche acoustic/singer solo artist voice
« Last Edit: April 13, 2009, 01:50:54 AM by TimmyDX »
Logged
Pages: [1]   Go Up
« previous next »
 
SMF spam blocked by CleanTalk
SimplePortal 2.3.5 © 2008-2012, SimplePortal